


So Undignified

by jynx



Series: A Loving Heart is the Truest Wisdom [3]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: 3am Fic, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M, Zombie Crawl, zombie makeup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 12:30:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15437079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynx/pseuds/jynx
Summary: It's the end of the world as we know it (or is it?).





	So Undignified

**Author's Note:**

> pfft i had too much fun with this XD
> 
> Prompt:  
> 'i was unaware that there was an organized zombie crawl going on and i didn’t realize you were in a costume and i screamed in your face because i truly thought i was facing a zombie invasion’ au
> 
> Also, Rex's two "unnamed brothers" are Fives and Echo. They are twins. I wrote this, legit, at 3am and was lazy. :D?

Obi-Wan really wanted a beer. Like, he was fucking thirsting for a damned beer after the day, night, week, hell--month, he'd been having. He needed alcohol and he needed it stat. It would take the edge off where the nicotine hadn't. 

Of course once he had stepped off the subway and gotten to street-level, things had changed. The calm chaos of the underground had changed into actual chaos of what-the-actual-fuck. He pulled off his headphones and stared in numb horror as hundreds of people shuffled about, covered in gore. 

He honestly hoped it was makeup, or else they were all in trouble. There was a blonde girl who looked like her throat had been ripped out, her shirt covered in what Obi-Wan desperately hoped was faked blood, and had slashes down her face as well. Obi-Wan shifted from foot to foot, trying to decide how badly he wanted that drink, before deciding he didn't want it _that_ badly. 

Only, when he turned, he slammed right into another person. 

With an equally bloody and ripped shirt. 

He let out a completely dignified scream. 

So undignified. 

"Hey, hey, Obi, it's me!" the corpse said, laughing, hands on his arms. "It's Rex!" 

Obi-Wan, not aware he had squeezed his eyes shut, opened them. Rex? New boyfriend Rex? New boyfriend Rex was covered in… oh for fuck's sake. Zombie makeup. And those were some creepy ass contacts to make normally gorgeous brown eyes white. Rex's four brothers were with him as well, equally as made up and bloody, and laughing. 

"What the fuck?" Obi-Wan asked, trying to get his heart rate under control. 

"Zombie crawl," Rex said, grinning. "What do you think?" 

Obi-Wan narrowed his eyes. Rex had somehow managed to pale his dark skin down to a pallor and, with the aid of makeup, added enough fake blood to make it look like he'd been murdered quite viciously. There were open, bleeding gashes on his face and under his eyes were a subtle red, as was the area around his mouth. His neck actually looked like someone had tried to strangle him before someone, or something, had ripped a chunk out of his shoulder. His shirt was covered in fake blood and smeared with dirt, as were his jeans. 

"You look...dedicated," Obi-Wan said dryly. 

"We have some spare stuff," Rex's brother, Cody, said. That one Obi-Wan had met. "We could do you up. Ahsoka's around here somewhere, she's the makeup wiz. Hey, Boba! Where's your girl?" 

"How the fuck should I know?" the shortest Fett retorted. "It's a zoo out here!" 

"No, it's the apocalypse!" another brother, one of the twins, laughed. 

"You okay?" Rex asked, a hand on Obi-Wan's elbow. "Your texts were a little weird this week." 

Obi-Wan huffed. "Family and work stuff. My brother got engaged to his high school sweetheart and our family kind of imploded. Work is...work." 

"And you wanted a drink and found the world ending," Rex said. 

"Hey, Rex, c'mooooooon," one of the two unknown brothers whined. "We're falling behind." 

"It's fine," Obi-Wan said, noticing how--yes, the zombie hoard was moving on. "You can go, I'll be fine." 

Rex's eyes narrowed; Obi-Wan really, really hated those contacts. "Hey, I'll catch up with you guys later, yeah?" he said over his shoulder. 

Cody laughed, "Yeah, whatever, bro. Your clothes are in my car, okay?" 

"Wait, why would he--?" the other unknown brother started. 

"Oh my god, are you dumb?" his twin hissed, cuffing him on the back of his head. "C'mon, idiot." 

"Oh hey, I see Ahsoka!" Boba the short said, taking off. 

"Hey! Boba!" Cody said. "Rex, you owe me." 

Rex made some rude gesture at his brother's retreating back and grinned at Obi-Wan. "C'mon, I know a great bar this way." 

"Oh, uh, I was just going to hit up Punters," Obi-Wan said, letting Rex take his hand. 

"Eh, Punters is fine if you don't mind five dollar shots and pizza shoved through a hole in the wall but this bar is better, promise." 

"I like five dollar shots," Obi-Wan said with a smile. "Five dollars can buy you a lot." 

"Coop's has awesome food and awesome booze," Rex said with a shrug, squeezing Obi-Wan's hand. "They have this thing called drunken meatballs and they are amazing." 

Obi-Wan smiled and let himself be dragged off, Rex maneuvering them through the crowd easily. "Fine, whatever you said. I want several pickleback shots, though, and maybe some cheap ass disgusting beers." 

"Your idea of disgusting beer is something not microbrew," Rex teased. "It's cute." 

"I'm a Scottish import, I'm allowed to take my beer seriously," Obi-Wan said with a straight-face. 

"And yet you drink picklebacks," Rex said in a mock horrified voice. "I get the whiskey but the pickle juice chaser?" 

"Try it and then mock it," Obi-Wan said with a grin. 

"Never," Rex vowed. 

"Chicken," Obi-Wan said. 

"Butt," Rex said automatically. He paused and then grinned at Obi-Wan over his shoulder. "Sorry, siblings. I've been trained." 

Obi-Wan tried not to be charmed, honestly he did, but it was so hard not to be. He could feel his annoyance with the week lessening as Rex led them down street after street until they got to a classy looking sports bar that Obi-Wan would never have stepped in. 

"After you," Rex said, letting go of his hand and opening the door. 

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. "Don't think that just because you're being charming means a damned thing." 

"Oh, I wouldn't," Rex said. "I am showing you an awesome bar to make up for scaring the crap out of you earlier. In the vain hope of maybe you letting me use your shower later? This makeup stuff is a bitch to take off." 

Obi-Wan stepped into the bar, trying not to laugh. Shower. Sure. He'd see if Rex would try a pickleback shot first and see where they went from there. 


End file.
